Writers block. Head hurts. Rather ill. There will be a vlog up tomorrow, there will be Let's Plays galore for a bit.

I feel bad because I've been just... fuckin' dead of late. But there will be some vloging and everything. So, again, I am very sorry. Post to come.

In the mean time. TOP 11 GAMES! Under some unusual circumstances.



...why is the screen dimensions kinda funky?

If I had traffic like Spoony's, I'd do a daily text update. Hmm. Anyhow.

So, new series up on YouTube, new channel up specifically for the blog, my intention to keep this going has only risen, and it will never end.

Regardless. SO. Bloodrayne was supposed to be out last week, and it still isn't. Slated to be this weekend. I know, I know, Griff, what the fuck, why isn't it up. Well, lemme explain. I am a clod. A huge tool of a moron of a clod. Somehow, my password got corrupted. I mean, none of my older passwords worked, none of my wife's passwords worked, we tried for six hours to get this restored. So, I was forced to go and restore to factory default. And yes, I tried to even Reformat knowing that vista will keep as much of your old files as possible. But no. Nothing. No dice.

So, I started my MGS3 Let's Play. Which part one will be linked below along with a link to the channel. And yes, once it's all said and done, I will make it into a playlist and all that. Bloodrayne... well, I'd love to have it out Saturday, then start on the next immediately.

But, ah yeah.

http://www.youtube.com/Morivanism

Uwe Boll Hell - Episode One!

Video at bottom of post.

Well, folks, here it is. The artsy, funky kinda thinger, Uwe Boll Hell Episode One. I am actually on my way to our friend's house as i type this, because she's going to be married today. Huzzah! Video of that coming soon, but that's neither here nor there.

So. Uwe Boll Hell. Basically, I'm gonna review The Big Five, starting with Bloodrayne. Half because it's the one he's making another sequal to, and half because aside from House of the Dead, it's the only one I'm familiar with, and considering there was a six month stint where that was the only game I owned, it's a big one for me. The game was... alright, it was decently executed, but it was nothing special, I admit. I still liked it, and it was a different kind of challenge.

Anyway, yeah, The plan is kind of out of order. Bloodrayne, Alone in the Dark, In the Name of the King (Dungeon Siege), Postal and House of the Dead. The reason I'm doing that is, well, Alone in the Dark and Dungeon Siege weren't good, but they weren't nearly as bad as Postal or House of the Dead. Postal for being just... unfunny, for lack of a better term, and House of the Dead... yich... you'll see, folks.

And what can I say about this one? It's not a review, but I knew I needed to do an introduction into the Uwe Boll series. I'd venture to say that despite it being just me, and there being literally no budget, that ten minute portion was better than the entirety of Uwe Boll's ten hours of video game debauchery. Hell, he oughta fund me and I'll make a decent movie, if it'll shut him up. Though, knowing him and if I were to appear as a blip, he'd want to box me.

lolwat?

Getting back to the point, this video was actually pretty easy to do, I just had a TON going on the last two weeks, but I wanna thank those who helped out, Covenant, Lynnie, and of course, as promised, Reanchi and Jaze, thanks a ton for your contributions to the project. Thanks to those two donations, I can now do video game consoles, or pretty much anything I can find that uses an RCA jack. Which, incidentally, includes almost all consoles.

It's been a hell of a thing, you know? I don't know what I expected. I wanted to get onto TGWTG, and I still kinda do, although moreso, I'd like to appear as part of TSE, assuming he'd ever take on a permanent addition. But in the mean time, I will continue. I'll be writing a thread in the TSE, so hopefully, that'll draw some attention. So, what else is there to say? I have enjoyed making this video, and I will enjoy ripping up five Uwe Boll movies in a row. So let's do this.

So, by popular demand, give me money.

So, lemme start. I am a participant in The Spoony Experiment, I am a member of the Ventrilo Channel dedicated there in, and am an admin. Granted, you wouldn't know it until I preform the touch of death, as it were. As such, it came up that I do reviews. Granted at, like, a once-every-three-weeks format. Which... is not good. I'm not terribly pleased with that pace, but admittedly, inspiration has been scarce. I mean, I finally came up with how I want to go about this, and so you'll get Episode 1 of Uwe Boll Hell come saturday. But onto a different matter.

Lately, people of the Vent channel have been asking me about donations. I had been a little conflicted about it, since I'm still not putting out videos quickly, but after another request, I figured, the hell with it, I may as well put something up. As you can see above in this post, as well as to the side below the search bar, I am now accepting donations. Here are my rules.

When you're giving me money, it's... well, it's pretty much like you're giving me money. I'm just a dude, and I am no charity. What I can say is that I promise, anything that comes through that paypal account will be used SOLELY with the intent of improving my reviews, purchasing either equipment, movies, games or programs to improve the quality of my work unless expressly given under different circumstances. Basically, unless you put "This is for you, not Morivanism" in the comment box, it goes straight to my work.

I still don't know how I feel about this, and for the one person who asked about giving me a Virtual Boy, first off, I like my eyes working, thanks, but secondly, I don't really foresee ever needing a P O box, so I'm not sure how I should handle that. We'll just see for later, I suppose. Anyhow, see you in two days.

REPO! Angry Rant

Ah, REPO! The Genetic Opera. This review was interesting in for a couple things. Firstly, if you've never seen Repo? I try to summarize it as absolutely much as possible, but the thing is, this one is bordering more on NERD RAYGE than it does on proper Reviewmanship. A mark on my record, to be sure. But what can I do? This is a truly odd movie in that, I like the music. No, I love the music. Zdunich did an outstanding job, particularly in regards to the Nathan/Repo/Mag songs. I am in love with those three characters. And I say three, because I defy anyone to listen to this blind and manage to decide those are the same person. I strongly doubt it.

Now, despie my love for the music, I hate. HATE. The movie itself. Why? Well, watch the video, you dunce!

There were some things that I did not touch upon. Reason for this, number one, is time. I'm sitting just on the nose of nineteen minutes, and I almost feel bad for taking so much damned time. I feel weird taking up a long period, because one, I'm still pretty new to all this, and despite being told otherwise from certain members of the TSE, I am not terribly confident just yet.

...I've rambled. This video has been a nightmare on par with... well... nightmares. For a good while, I was plagued with quite the sound issue. For lack of better terms, I shot the video once last week, all done, and when I went to edit, there was this loud, half buzz half swoosh that took up a good 3/4ths the video, rendering it totally useless. No amount of noise suppression or focusing could fix the issue, so I was a little down trodden. Forced to start from scratch, I began anew, including a second script. The first one felt... I dunno, just really, really clinical, and its just sorta... Ugh, nah, I'm done with all that.

Regardless, I delve into the Riddler's next puzzling mess of a movie, by which I mean two weeks from now, I am gonna tackle Uwe Boll's Bloodrayne.

See ya later, folks.

EDIT

Okay. Here we are on day three of trying to get this video finished. Let's recap. Day one, the video was mostly edited when my computer as a whole crashed. I restarted shortly afterwards. Saturday, I took a day for myself and my wife, because since she's going to College and we don't get to spend most days together. But last night, I put it back together. Now, today, I had to publish it. Which took about two to three hours of just bogged down, painful loading, can't do anything else on this laptop when it's publishing, it fucking sucks. It was published, I moved it over the Windows Movie Maker.

PROTIP : Making a video, but Vegas doesn't exactly see eye to eye with your computer? Publish it in uncompressed AVI, then put the file as is into Windows Movie Maker (I hear iStudio works the same, don't know) and just publish as a .wmv or what have you. Minimal loss of quality, outstanding compression. It's surprising, be honest.

Anyway, last night and today, Blip gave me some hassle, but I don't mind much, I just apologize that this review is roughly 36 hours late. I'll try not to repeat that error in the future, folks.




Edited again.

I'm not happy with this one. Looking at it again, this is by far my worst work. You can tell I had a technical nightmare with this, and I just don't like it. I will send in to Mike Michaud in two weeks time with the Bloodrayne review, but in the mean time... consider this more like REPO! The Nerd Rage. Sorry for the general let down. Just now happy with this one.

Apparently, I really hate myself. Who knows.

...Interesting. I think what I might have to start doing is linking to my videos with a small picture so that I don't have overlappings. Also, I'm not entirely sure what's going on with that list. It was something I should not have posted, but consider it a guideline rather than a real dateline. It was a bad idea on my part. Sorry folks.

Anyhow. Gonna write, shoot and edit over the next three days, upload the first review and I'm gonna start slapping my videos out in rapid fire. I'll just stagger the posting.

Yeah. Major sound issues on that video. I managed to cut that whirring noise off of this part, a little bit. But between that and I felt like my skit part was just... rushed. Poor quality.

I BRING YOU NOTHING BUT THE BEST!

Yoink.

Edited. I don't know why I posted this list, exactly. I have no intention on doing some of the stuff on that list. So. I'll post a real list soon.

I was so fucking tired when I made that video, and by the time I got through publishing and rendering and then shrinking the file, I just didn't want to post it.

There ya go.

Hmm. So we now have four dead celebrities. It's sad, to be sure, but I find it really weird. I mean, Ed McMahon and Farrah Fawcett, not terribly weird. Farrah has been going for a while, and Ed was old enough, he used to know Atlus.

The oddity comes in with Michael Jackson and Billy Mays. Now, it's come out lately that Michael Jackson might have been intentionally murdered by the physician who lived with him. Overinjected? We'll see soon enough. Now, I know the argument stands with two opinions. It's either He's an amazing musician and he will forever be missed, OR, he's a child raping crazy plastic man.

I'm with the first group. I honestly do not think that he did anything to those boys. I think it's horse shit. The parents are liars. Anyone who had even a minute amount of care for their child would never have settled out of court. They would have chased the case as far as possible to get him locked up. So, no, in this case, fuck off.

And then there is Billy Mays. Now, he was found earlier today dead in his home after something of a rough landing on his way into Tampa, FL. Apparently the tires on the landing gear blew out on landing. Now, call me crazy all you like, but I think I know exactly who's responsible for this, and it ain't Delta Air.


That's right. Vince Offer is the one who did it. He planned it right up to the point where he murdered Mays in his home. His first attempt was merely the landing. "Y'gonna love my spikes." Road spikes on the runway. He wrung his hands, cackling as the plane shuddered on landing. "Head Trauma, Drama, Obama, A Llama." Cursing when he saw Mays survived, he followed him home, where in he put Slap Chop'd bits if arsenic and the tip of his tongue into his dinner while no one was lookin'. "Stop having boring ads, Stop having a boring life."